So, in all honesty, I really haven't felt much "inspired" or "lead" to write anything... and I feel - as I've been rediscovering and re-evaluating the vision God's given me for my life - that even though I hold these inhibitors still, I need to push through them.

The post I set up yesterday was something I wrote almost two years back. I was attending a small congregation of the Four Sqaure church and the pastor there encouraged us (the members) to feel confident to prepare a message the Lord gave us and he'd give us a Sunday service to share it. This was supposed to be Part One of Three or Four on a series seeking how God inspires change - seeking it as I was trying to live it.

I clung to starting with conviction since personally I strive to seek conviction in my life. My viewpoint of myself as a person leads me to believe that I'm not lacking good qualities - that I have little to no room for improvement. Oddly enough this idea manages to sub-consciously co-exist with my ever-present awareness of certain faults. If you couldn't guess, this quickly and easily leads to personal and spiritual stagnation.

When I first came to accept Yeshua's sacrifice for my sins, I hungered for conviction. I felt it the one thing that could change me, pull me from the self-destructive cycle of knowing I'm truly far from who I want to be, but sub-consciously content with who I am. When I started to investigate the Biblical presence and usage of conviction, I came to realize that it was only the first step, and probably the easiest.

Looking into my own life as I wrote, I saw more and more that when I met the conviction I so hungered for, I often didn't complete the process of change. I'm intending to work on Step Two: Confession - which will be posted here once I manage to complete it - which I've also managed to achieve following certain convictions. Unfortunately, the part I, and I'm sure many others, have the most trouble with is Step Three: Complete Change - Repentance.

The more imminent question I have before me is this - Vision. Purpose - God, what am I supposed to be doing with this life?

I have a small gasping presence of His vision for my life in hand... but my eyes are dimmed by this life and the last two years of abandoning it and leaving it to die, lost in my past. I need to nurture that vision, allow God to feed it, strengthen it - and allow God to clear my eyes and strengthen my soul for the work he has established for me.

Step one: Conviction.

Conviction is often misunderstood, or mistook for man judging man, or for man causing offence. However, The Holy Spirit alone is capable of convicting a man of his iniquities and helps him accept this first step of repentance.

However, Conviction is vital, without it, change can not occur! Often people will refer to Romans 8:1 “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit,” when confronted with conviction. This verse is too commonly used to negate the requirement of conviction in the walk of a Christian. This misuse spreads a ‘feel-good’ message of half truth, especially when only the first part, “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus,” is quoted.

Open to Hebrews 12:4-6. Now we read this about our Father in Heaven: “You have not resisted to bloodshed, striving against sin. And you have forgotten the exhortation which speaks to you as to sons: ‘My son, do not despise the chastening of the Lord, nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him; For whom the Lord loves He chastens, and scourges every son whom He receives.’”

Now, it is true, and Thank God it is, that we do not receive condemnation, now that we have accepted Christ as our Lord and Savior. This does not mean that we can continue to live life just the way we were when we were first saved. God loves us, and He rebukes, convicts, those He loves in order to change us. Conviction through the Holy Spirit comes through the boundless Love of God to put us on the path of repentance and effectively lead us, by hand, to becoming more like His sons and daughters.

We need to understand just how important it is to be able to receive conviction with a thankful heart. Not only does God want to change you, He wants to use your obedience and your decision to change to help convict and change others around you. Look at Titus 1:7-9. “For [an elder] must be blameless, as a steward of God.” Stop there. Who is this elder being a steward of? Us. The body of Christ. God’s sons and daughters. That’s who God has made the elder a steward of. Why is he our steward? Continue reading: “not self-willed.” Now stop and think a moment… If we reject conviction, how can we call ourselves stewards of God? Regardless of what God places before us to be stewards of, we can’t watch over it without handing Him our will and doing His instead. Lets keep reading: “not quick-tempered, not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but hospitable, a lover of what is good, sober minded, just, holy, self-controlled, holding fast the faithful word as he has been taught, that he may be able, by sound doctrine, both to exhort and convict those who contradict.”

Verse 9 in the amplified says this: “He must hold fast to the sure and trustworthy Word of God as he was taught it, so that he may be able both to give stimulating instruction and encouragement in sound (wholesome) doctrine and to refute and convict those who contradict and oppose it [showing the wayward their error].”

How many of us know that if we’re not accepting God’s discipline, we’re contradicting and opposing the Word of God? God has established stewards among us who serve God though exhortation of those who are in line with God’s will and plan for their lives, AND to convict those who are out of line with God’s will! This second part is not referring to those who do not know Christ, those who are not free from condemnation as stated in Romans 8:1. There is a duty of conviction within the body of Christ, that’s what God’s saying in Titus 1:9. We can choose to heed God’s call and convictions, be it during prayer and coming directly from Him, or be it from one God sends as a steward over our lives.

We know that Jesus has already sent us a councilor, The Counciler, the Holy Spirit (John 16:7). “and when he had come, He will convict the world of sin.” (John 16:8a). Through the Holy Spirit, which can include a brother lead by the Holy Spirit, God delivers His conviction of our sins, so that we may accept His punishment and be refined, with His love pouring out of us.

We need to receive conviction with joy. Change comes from Confession, Confession is inspired by Conviction, Conviction comes from the Holy Spirit, and the Holy Spirit speaks only what He hears from God. Finally, God sends His Holy Spirit out of Love for us! To see us change and serve Him with all we are!

Thank you God! Thank you for your love! Thank you for your conviction of my ways that wrong you! Thank you for enabling me to confess them to you and you will listen! Thank you for giving me the strength I need to change for you! Thank you for loving me! Lord, make me yours, and make me like you! In Yeshua' Name! Amen!